After a California school shooting a few years ago, parents and teachers
were somewhat shocked to see kids at that school acting out the shooting
during their daily play.
What they discovered was that the kids who were doing this were attempting to deal with their feelings by normalizing them. By absorbing the events into their school play culture, they all found a way to get in touch with their feelings as a group, examine what had happened from all sides by role play, and digest the events as a part of their collective experience.
Kids will find a way to talk to those they trust, to process their feelings and get back to "normal." They are resilient. All they need is for you to be a safe place to turn, when they're ready to talk, or play, or use whatever communication method they need, on their own time.
Parents can make a safe place for their children to express what's in their hearts, jut by listening. A child may ramble on and on about his favorite video game, or her friends at school, all you need to do is let them speak, as long as they need to. A little patience for these little daily moments will pay you both back when it comes time for your child to tell you more important things.
What they discovered was that the kids who were doing this were attempting to deal with their feelings by normalizing them. By absorbing the events into their school play culture, they all found a way to get in touch with their feelings as a group, examine what had happened from all sides by role play, and digest the events as a part of their collective experience.
Kids will find a way to talk to those they trust, to process their feelings and get back to "normal." They are resilient. All they need is for you to be a safe place to turn, when they're ready to talk, or play, or use whatever communication method they need, on their own time.
Parents can make a safe place for their children to express what's in their hearts, jut by listening. A child may ramble on and on about his favorite video game, or her friends at school, all you need to do is let them speak, as long as they need to. A little patience for these little daily moments will pay you both back when it comes time for your child to tell you more important things.
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